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Romance Jokes
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Wedding Question
While attending a family wedding, a little girl asks her Mum why the bride is always seen wearing white.
Her Mum replies, "Well white is a bright colour, and is associated with happiness. Remember today is the happiest day of her life."
After thinking for a second or two the girl asks again, "So why is the Groom wearing black then?"
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mweird
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10 Things not to do on Valentine's Day
1. Recite your dating history. Improvise. Include pets.
2. Stand up every five minutes, circle your table with your arms outstretched, and make aeroplane sounds.
3. Pull out a harmonica and play blues songs when your date begins talking about themselves.
4. When ordering, inquire whether the restaurant has any live food.
5. Ask your date how much money they have with them.
6. If they are paying, order the most expensive thing on the menu. Take one bite. Yawn.
7. Slide under the table. Take your plate with you.
8. Beg your date to tattoo your name on their back. Keep bringing the subject up.
9. Insist that the waiter cut your food into little pieces. In a similar vein, insist that he take a bite of everything on the plate, to make sure no one poisoned it.
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merlin
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Valentine's Day Advice
1. Don't tell your partner about that perfect present you almost bought.
2. Don't give the same Valentine card you gave your partner last year.
3. Don't buy the wrong size/brand of anything.
4. Don’t forget to wear clean clothes.
5. Don't tell your date you forgot your wallet again.
6. Don't leave your date alone with your parents, flatmates or pet.
7. Don't buy your partner household appliances for Valentine's Day.
8. Don't wipe your nose on your sleeve.
9. Don't give your partner an engagement ring that was meant for someone else!
10. Don’t club baby fur seals.
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merlin
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Hello Ex-Valentine
Dear Ex-Valentine,
I'm so miserable without you. It's almost like having you around.
Regards, Your Ex
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merlin
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